英语幽默趣味小故事
妈蛋！这母女好逆天
英语幽默趣味小故事：赌博
“ I want you to help me stop my son gambling. ” an anxious father said to his boy's principal. “ I don't know where he gets it from, but it's bet, bet, bet. ”
“ Leave it to me, ” said the principal.
A week later he phoned the boy's father. “ I think I've cured him,” he said.
“ How? ”
“ Well, I saw him looking at my beard and he said, ” I bet that's a false beard, “ How much? I said, and he said $ 5 ”
“ What happened ? ” asked the father.
“ Well he tugged my beard which is quite natural and I made him give me $5. I'm sure that'll teach him a lesson! ”
“ No, it won't,” said the father. “He bet me $10 on Monday that he'd pull your beard with your permission by the end of the week! ”
“ 我想你帮我制止我儿子赌博。 ” 一位焦急的父亲对儿子的校长说。 “ 我不知道他从哪儿学来的，总是赌 , 赌 , 赌。 ”“ 交给我吧! ” 校长说。
一周后，他打电话给男孩的父亲。 “ 我想我已使他改邪归正。 ” 他说。
“ 怎么办到的? ”
“ 噢，他看着我的胡子，然后说： ' 我打赌那是假胡子。 ' ' 赌多少钱? ' 我问，他说 5 美元。 ”
“ 后来怎样? ” 父亲问道。
“ 于是他拉扯了我的胡子后，知道那是货真价实的，我就要他给我 5 美元。我敢肯定我给了他一个教训。 ”
“ 不行，那没用。 ” 父亲说。 “ 星期一他和我赌了 10 美元，说周末他可以让你允许他拔你的胡子! ”
英语幽默趣味小故事：金鱼
Stan: I won 92 goldfish.
Fred: Where are you going to keep them?
Stan: In the bathroom 。
Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?
Stan: Blindfold them!
斯丹：我赢了 92 条金鱼。
弗雷德：你想在哪儿养它们?
斯丹：浴室。
弗雷德：但是你想洗澡时怎么办?
斯丹：蒙住它们的眼睛!
英语幽默趣味小故事：拳击和赛跑
Dan is teaching his son how to box. As he does so, he left his friend, “This is a tough world, so I'm teaching my boy to fight.”
Friend: “But suppose he comes up against someone much bigger than he is, who's also been taught how to box.”
Dan: “I'm teaching him how to run, too.”
丹在教他的儿子怎样拳击。他告诉他的`朋友：“这是一个粗暴的世界，所以我要教我的儿子怎么去拼搏。”
朋友：“如果他碰上的对手是一个比他高大，健壮而且也会拳击的人怎么办?”
丹：“我也会教他怎么样赛跑。”
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