2017英语笑话经典段子
天冷了，有点冻脚！小伙伴们都围起来！！
英语笑话经典段子(一)
一个小男孩非常想要一百美元买一辆自行车，但是祈祷了两个星期也没有结果。于是，他决定给上帝写一封信要这一百美元。当邮局收到这封收信人为“美国，上帝”的信后，他们决定把它寄给美国总统。总统很重视，也很感动。他命令他的秘书寄给个小男孩五美元纸钞。总统认为这对于一个小男孩来说应该是一笔大钱了。这个小男孩收到这五美元后非常高兴，又坐下来给上帝写了一封感谢信，信中写道:
A little boy wanted one hundred dollar for a bicycle very badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the money. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA，they decided to send it to the president. The President was so impressed，touched and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a five bill. The President thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted wish the five-dollar bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord, which read:
亲爱的上帝:
Dear Lord，
非常感谢你寄给我的钱。可是我发现，由于某种原因您通过华盛顿寄给我的钱，像往常一样，那些奇怪的'人扣走了九十五美元。
Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and as usual, those jerks deducted ninety-five dollars.
罗杰
Love,Roger
英语笑话经典段子(二)
A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an old Indian went up to the director and said, "It will rain tomorrow." The next day it rained.
一个电影摄制组在沙漠深处进行拍摄。一天，一个印度老人来到导演面前对他说：“明天会下雨。”第二天果然下雨了。
A week later, the Indian went up to the director again and said, "There will be a storm tomorrow." The next day there was a storm.
一周以后，印度人又来了，他告诉导演说：“明天会有暴风雨。”果然，第二天有暴风雨。
"This Indian is incredible," said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.
“这个印度人真神，”导演说。他告诉他的秘书去雇佣这个印度人来预测天气。
However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn't show up for two weeks.
然而，几次预测天气成功之后，这个印度人连续两周没有露面。
Finally the director sent for him. "I have to shoot an important scene tomorrow," said the director. "And I'm depending on you. What will the weather be like?"
最后，导演派人把这个印度人请来了。导演对他说：“我明天必须拍摄一个很重要的场景，全都指望你了，明天天气如何啊?”
The Indian shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know," he said. "My radio is broken."
这个印度人耸了耸肩说道：“我不知道，我的收音机坏了。”
英语笑话经典段子(三)
One open hummer turn a corner to meet acquaintances, chat.
When a guy says: "the elder brothers, to drive forward, narrow road, a corner to my car."
Open hummer says scornfully: "what car you drive not to, wait a minute."
Men spoke a few times, hummer owner did not move.
Guy a little bit angry said: "don't move is! A moment touch bad don't call ah!"
Then go, hummer owner and his friend also said: "what car and don't touch me."
Just then, his friend looked up, said: "you still let! He came over."
Hummer owners turned a look, oh! Get on the bus go right away.
Just behind the man in the call: "you are not afraid of touch? Don't go!"
Hummer owner: "you didn't say you open the digger!"
一人开悍马到拐弯出碰到熟人，下车聊天。
这时过来一男的说：“哥们，车朝前开开，拐弯路窄，我车过不来。”
开悍马车不屑的说：“你开什么车过不来，等一会。”
男的说了几次，悍马车主就是不动。
男的有点生气说：“不动是吧!一会碰坏了别叫呀!”
然后走了，悍马车主还和他朋友说：“什么车能和我别碰。”
正说着，他朋友抬头一看说：“你还是让让吧!他开过来了。”
悍马车主转身一看，哎呀!马上上车就走。
刚才那男的在后面叫：“你不是不怕碰吗?别走呀!”
悍马车主：“你也没说你开的挖掘机呀!”
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